Living after the Manner of Happiness


There is not a person on this earth that doesn’t crave happiness, yet as we wander and try to chase it, it flits out of our grasp like an illusive butterfly.  Much to our dismay, we find that…

Happiness is not given to us in a package that we can just open up and consume.” -James E. Faust

Given the tests, trials and learning experiences this earth life is intended to provide, I do not believe that God intended to make us happy 24 hours a day

Happiness is not so much a destination as
 it is the manner in which we choose to live.

How do we live after the manner of happiness when so many unhappy things surround us?

“In God’s plan we can do very much to find the happiness we desire and we can be happy so very much of the time.” We can take certain steps, we can form certain habits that follow what God has shown us in history lead to happiness.  We can have confidence that if we live in such a manner, that our chances to find happiness will improve exponentially as we, “find joy in unexpected moments, and peace is unexpected places… find the help of angels when we didn’t even know that they existed or that they knew that we existed.”- Jeffery R. Holland

“Ultimate happiness, true peace, anything remotely resembling scriptural joy are found first and foremost in living the gospel of Jesus Christ.”- Jeffery R. Holland
This is the key then… actually living the gospel, not just knowing about it.  Christ said, “I am the way, the truth and the life… and whatsoever you shall ask in my name, that will I do… and if ye shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it.” (John 14:6, 13-14)

He is saying to his disciples in essence ‘live my way and my truth… live my life… live in this manner that I am teaching you and  then what you ask will be right and true and it will come.’  It may not come immediately and it may not come until Heaven, but we are promised that it will come.

Unlike gratification or pleasure or some kind of thrill true happiness if found only along that well beaten gospel track.” – David O McKay.

Love God, love each other and be true to the gospel.

We need to learn that so much of our happiness is in our hands…

it is not in events or circumstances or fortune or misfortune… We can choose, if not happiness per say, we can choose to live after the manner of happiness.“- Holland

Four Key Aspects to Living After the Manner of Happiness

1. Think and speak and act positively. 

This is what happy people do!  It is a simple truth that…

Folks are usually as happy as they make up their minds to be.“- Abraham Lincoln

Happiness starts first with what comes into our heads a long time before it it is realized in our hands. So we start with the thoughts that we choose. The things that we desire and choose to think about will become what shapes us and our lives.

God expects a willing mind in the quest for happiness as well.  Put your head into this.  All of this takes effort.  It is a battle, a battle for happiness that is worth waging.”– Jeffery R. Holland

Our determined effort to manage and choose the thoughts and feelings to act on makes a huge different in the happiness that we see in our lives.

Happiness is the consequence of personal effort, you fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and look for it.  You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestation of your own blessings and once you have sustained a state of happiness never become lax in maintaining it.  You must make a might effort to keep swimming up into that happiness… to stay afloat un top of it.”  -Elizabeth Gilbert

2. Happy people are never unkind or unpleasant to be with

“You can NEVER build your happiness on someones else’s unhappiness.” Tearing other people down will never build us up. “Happy people are NOT negative or cynical or mean, so don’t plan on that being part of the manner of happiness.”-Jeffery R. Holland

Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness.  Let it be in your face, in your eyes and in your smile.” -Mother Theresa

3. Avoid animosity, anger and contention in your life.

Satan is the perpetrator of all negative feelings. He that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil… and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another.” (3 Nephi 11:29)  

That verb stir sound like a recipes for disaster. Put tempers on medium heat stir in a few choice words, bring to a boil. Continue Stirring until thick, cool off and let feelings chill for several days.  Serve cold.  Lots of leftovers’ -Lynn G. Robins

“Lots of leftovers indeed! Sometimes the damage goes on and on and on” “anger damages or destroys almost everything it touches.”

To harbor anger is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.  It is a vicious acid that will destroy the container long before it does damage to the intended object.“- Unknown

“I do not think that anger can exist or at least can be foster and entertained and indulged in in a life that is being lived after the manner of happiness.”

4.  If you want to be happy.., then work at it!  

As we learn to work and serve others diligently, satisfaction flows into our lives.  As we improve ourselves our self-esteem improves.

“A homespun definition of Christlike character might be: “The integrity to do the right thing at the right time and in the right way.” Don’t be idol and wasteful of the opportunities before you.. “including laboring for and serving others… one of the truly great keys to happiness.

How can we change our thoughts, our feelings and our actions to more fully change us and live after the manner of happiness?

I invite you to ask God this question and begin to study and act on those traits that will help you be a better person and live after the manner of happiness.

Additional Resource:
Robbins, Lynn G. “Agency and Anger,” April 1998 – This is a great short talk about our ability to not choose anger and how that affects our family relationship

Unmarked quotes are from Jeffery R Holland given in a BYUI Devotional “Living After the Manner of Happiness,” Sept 2014