Aug 5, 2012
I need to do a better job of recording the things I’m grateful for in my journal…
I’ve been keeping a separate list, and I’ve been doing a much better job in my prayers, but I think I should also include things I’m grateful for in my letters to my missionary son in Chile and in my journal entries. Today the Lord held back the rain so we could do the work we needed to on the path. I had two good helpers to help me get the work done. (R and E). I am grateful for the opportunities to work side-by-side with my children. I thought today of R as a mother, and how she will have much more confidence to take care of things in her yard and home because of her experience working with me. I thought of E and how he is looking stronger, and how working is helping him to become a man. We do not have a idle time. It is good to work hard and be sore and exhausted at the end of today. I read that same sentiment in my husband’s missionary journal today. How alike we are! The two of us together were always quite a team. He would say that. I guess we still are.
Sometimes I worry about the future for my kids. I worry about their mistakes, I worry about them falling away from God, I worry about them not being able to provide for their families. I need to have faith that a Lord will help them find the way. As a parent you want to protect your children, and you want everything to turn out perfect for them. But I guess if their life was perfect, they wouldn’t learn very much. They have to have life experiences that will teach them the things that they need to learn to become the people God wants them to become. In the end that’s all that really matters. This life isn’t about having the perfect experience. It’s about going through a lot of hard stuff that teaches you a lot of hard lessons- yet learning to find joy in the journey of it all. Now isn’t that the biggest challenge of all?
Now more gratitude. I’m grateful that these people are coming to see our house. I will probably be more grateful if it all works out, but even if it doesn’t, I will find things to be grateful for. It was the motivation to get the path fixed for spring. It gave me hope that there are people out there still looking. It helped me to see that I can move into a rental for the rest of the year. It also gave me some experience in dealing with realtors. I will be smarter next time. I am really grateful for all the opportunities I have to share spiritual insights through social media. It’s a way I can feel the spirit and feel like I’m contributing everyday. I don’t feel so selfish about my personal study. It’s a chance to put my candle on the hill instead of under a bushel. I’m grateful for the awesome experience I’m having with my scripture study. I’m getting so much out of journaling every verse. I’m so excited for my time to sit down with the scriptures and to see what I’m going to learn. I want to be able to understand everything right now and just get all the inspiration I can get, but I know the Lord has to give us line upon line and give us time to act and internalizes those principles. My impatience shows through. I’m grateful for Monday gymnastic lessons, because I get to walk for an hour and dictate my journal or listen to a conference talk. I love time to walk alone and think especially when I can talk out loud. I can talk to Scott sometimes and I feel like we are going out to walk together. I’m grateful for the little impressions the Lord gives me about my future, and has always given me. It’s good for me to have time to think it out and prepare and plan before hand. I can be more steady when the actual situation happens.